DTKAU DUNGEONS & DRAGONS THE WORLDS LARGEST DUNGEON KAI ABRIDGED ULTRA
by azgbchdfjlvhmnsshwawprytthking
Summary: IF YOU ARE READING THIS YOU AGREE TO HAVE YOUR UNCONSCIOUS MIND LUCID DREAM REM STAGES PERFECT HEIGHT WEIGHT EYES HAIR SKIN INFINITE STRENGTH DEXTERITY CONSTITUTION INTELLIGENCE WISDOM CHARISMA GHOST REINCARNATE RESSURRECT YOURSELF, and you have already slain and ressurected every other being in all the planes 111
1. Chapter 1 THE CHARACTERS!

Table of Contents and Characters

Barbarian (Bbn)

Bard (Brd)

Cleric (Clr)

Druid (Drd)

Fighter (Ftr)

Monk (Mnk)

Paladin (Pal)

Ranger (Rgr)

Rogue (Rog)

Sorcerer (Sor)

Wizard (Wiz)

Archivist

Beguiler

Binder

Crusader

Dragon Shaman

Dragonfire Adept

Dread Necromancer

Duskblade

Factotum

Healer

Hexblade

Incarnate

Knight

Marshal

Ninja

Samurai

Scout

Shaman

Shadowcaster

Shugenja

Sohei

Soulborn

Spellthief

Spirit Shaman

Swashbuckler

Swordsage

Totemist

Truenamer

Warblade

Warlock

Warmage

Wu Jen

Prestige Classes

Arcane Archer

Assassin

Blackguard

Dwarven Defender

Loremaster

Shadowdancer

Arcane Trickster

Archmage

Dragon Disciple

Duelist

Eldritch Knight

Hierophant

Horizon Walker

Mystic Theurge

Red Wizard

Thaumaturgist

Cancer Mage

Demonologist

Diabolist

Disciple of Asmodeus

Disciple of Baalzebul

Disciple of Dispater

Disciple of Mammon

Disciple of Mephistopheles

Lifedrinker

Mortal Hunter

Soul Eater

Thrall of Demogorgon

Thrall of Graz'zt

Thrall of Juiblex

Thrall of Orcus

Ur-Priest

Vermin Lord

Warrior of Darkness

Church Inquisitor

Consecrated Harrier

Contemplative

Divine Oracle

Holy Liberator (Epic[2])

Hospitaler

Hunter of the Dead

Knight of the Chalice

Knight of the Middle Circle

Master of Shrouds

Sacred Exorcist

Sacred Fist

Templar

Warpriest

Agent Retriever

Cosmic Descryer

Divine Emissary

Epic Infiltrator

Guardian Paramount

High Proselytizer

Legendary Dreadnought

Perfect Wight

Union Sentinel

Fiend of Blasphemy

Fiend of Corruption

Fiend of Possession

Divine Agent

Gatecrasher

Planar Champion

Planeshifter

Animal Lord

Bane of Infidels

Blighter

Bloodhound

Deepwood Sniper

Exotic Weapon Master

Eye of Gruumsh

Foe Hunter

Forsaker

Frenzied Berserker

Geomancer

Hexer

King/Queen of the Wild

Oozemaster

Shifter

Tamer of Beasts

Tempest

Verdant Lord

Watch Detective

Windrider

Metamind

Pyrokineticist

Slayer

Soulknife

Doomdreamer

Emancipated Spawn

Illithid Savant

Master of Flies

Scaled Horror

Siren

Slaad Brooder

Survivor

Sybil

Waverider

Yuan-Ti Cultist

Dread Pirate

Dungeon Delver

Fang of Lolth

Outlaw of the Crimson Road

Royal Explorer

Spymaster

Temple Raider of Olidammara

Thief-Acrobat

Vigilante

Virtuoso

Cavalier

Devoted Defender

Drunken Master

Duelist

Fist of Hextor

Ghostwalker

Gladiator

Halfling Outrider

Knight Protector of the Great Kingdom

Lasher

Master of Chains

Master Samurai

Ninja of the Crescent Moon

Order of the Bow Initiate

Ravager

Red Avenger

Tribal Protector

Warmaster

Weapon Master

Acolyte of the Skin

Alienist

Arcane Trickster

Bladesinger

Blood Magus

Candle Caster

Dragon Disciple

Elemental Savant

Fatespinner

Mage of the Arcane Order

Mindbender

Pale Master

Spellsword

True Necromancer

Wayfarer Guide

Anointed Knight

Apostle of Peace

Beloved of Valarian

Celestial Mystic

Champion of Gwynharwyf

Defender of Sealtiel

Emissary of Barachiel

Exalted Arcanist

Fist of Raziel

Initiate of Pistis Sophia

Lion of Talisid

Prophet of Erathaol

Risen Martyr

Sentinel of Bharrai

Skylord

Slayer of Domiel

Stalker of Karash

Swanmay

Sword of Righteousness

Troubadour of Stars

Vassal of Bahamut

Wonderworker

Ebonmar Infiltrator

Crimson Scourge

Urban Savant

Animal Lord

Beastmaster

Bloodhound

Daggerspell Mage

Daggerspell Shaper

Dread Pirate

Dungeon Delver

Exemplar

Fochlucan Lyrist

Ghost-Faced Killer

Highland Stalker

Maester

Master of Many Forms

Nightsong Enforcer

Nightsong Infiltrator

Ollam

Shadowbane Inquisitor

Shadowbane Stalker

Shadowmind

Spymaster

Streetfighter

Tempest

Thief-Acrobat

Vigilante

Virtuoso

Wild Plains Outrider

Acolyte of the Skin

Alienist

Argent Savant

Blood Magus

Effigy Master

Elemental Savant

Enlightened Fist

Fatespinner

Geometer

Green Star Adept

Initiate of the Sevenfold Veil

Mage of the Arcane Order

Master Transmogrifist

Mindbender

Seeker of the Song

Sublime Chord

Suel Arcanamach

Wayfarer Guide

Wild Mage

Fist of the Forest

Forest Reeve

Holt Warden

Mythic Exemplar

Ordained Champion

Paragnostic Apostle

Paragnostic Initiate

Sanctified One

Shadowspy

Shadowstriker

Squire of Legend

Black Flame Zealot

Blighter

Church Inquisitor

Consecrated Harrier

Contemplative

Divine Crusader

Divine Oracle

Entropomancer[7]

Evangelist

Geomancer

Holy Liberator

Hospitaler

Pious Templar[8]

Radiant Servant of Pelor

Rainbow Servant

Sacred Exorcist

Sacred Fist

Seeker of the Misty Isle

Shining Blade of Heironeous

Stormlord (Epic [9])

Temple Raider of Olidammara

Ur-Priest

Void Disciple

Warpriest

Abjurant Champion

Eldritch Disciple

Eldritch Theurge

Enlightened Spirit

Holy Scourge

Lyric Thaumaturge

Master Specialist

Nightmare Spinner

Ultimate Magus

Unseen Seer

Wild Soul

Anarchic Initiate

Ebon Saint

Ectopic Adept

Flayerspawn Psychic

Illumine Soul

Soulbow

Storm Disciple

Zerth Cenobite

Avenging Executioner

Battle Trickster

Cloaked Dancer

Combat Trapsmith

Fortune's Friend

Gray Guard

Magical Trickster

Malconvoker

Master Of Masks

Mountebank

Psibond Agent

Spellwarp Sniper

Uncanny Trickster

Bear Warrior

Bladesinger

Cavalier

Darkhunter

Darkwood Stalker

Dervish

Drunken Master

Exotic Weapon Master

Eye of Gruumsh

Frenzied Berserker

Gnome Giant-Slayer

Halfling Outrider

Hulking Hurler

Hunter of the Dead

Invisible Blade

Justicar

Kensai

Knight of the Chalice

Knight Protector

Master Thrower

Master of the Unseen Hand

Mindspy

Nature's Warrior

Occult Slayer

Order of the Bow Initiate

Purple Dragon Knight

Rage Mage[10]

Ravager

Reaping Mauler

Ronin

Spellsword

Stonelord

Tattooed Monk

Thayan Knight

War Chanter

Warshaper

Bloodscaled Fury

Disciple of Ashardalon

Dispassionate Watcher of Chronepsis

Dracolyte

Dragon Ascendant

Dragonkith

Dragonrider

Dragonslayer

Dragonsong Lyricist

Dragonstalker

Elemental Master

Hidecarved Dragon

Hoardstealer

Initiate of the Draconic Mysteries

Platinum Knight

Sacred Warder of Bahamut

Talon of Tiamat

Unholy Ravager of Tiamat

Diamond Dragon

Dragon Descendant

Dragon Lord

Hand of the Winged Masters

Pact-Bound Adept

Swift Wing

Wyrm Wizard

Arachnomancer

Cavestalker

Demonbinder

Dread Fang of Lolth

Eye of Lolth

Insidious Corruptor

Kinslayer

Beast Heart Adept

Dungeon Lord

Trapsmith

Cerebremancer

Elocater

Fist of Zuoken

Illithid Slayer

Metamind

Psion Uncarnate

Pyrokineticist

Thrallherd

War Mind

Knight of the Raven

Demonwrecker

Jaunter

Hellbreaker

Hellfire Warlock

Hellreaver

Soulguard

Cloud Anchorite

Cryokineticist

Disciple of Thrym

Frost Mage

Frostrager

Knight of the Iron Glacier

Primeval

Rimefire Witch

Stormsinger

Winterhaunt of Iborighu

Arboreal Guardian

Bone Collector

Deathwarden Chanter

Ghost Slayer

Combat Medic

Dread Commando

Legendary Leader

War Weaver

Corrupt Avenger

Death Delver

Dread Witch

Fiend-Blooded

Purifier of the Hallowed Doctrine

Tainted Scholar

Death's Chosen

Dirgesinger

Ephemeral Exemplar

Lurking Terror

Master of Radiance

Master of Shrouds

Master Vampire

Pale Master

Sacred Purifier

Tomb Warden

True Necromancer

Aboleth Savant

Abolisher

Beholder Mage

Darkrunner

Fleshwarper

Keeper of the Cerulean Sign

Sanctified Mind

Topaz Guardian

Incandescent Champion

Incarnum Blade

Ironsoul Forgemaster

Necrocarnate

Sapphire Hierarch

Soulcaster

Spinemeld Warrior

Totem Rager

Umbral Disciple

Witchborn Binder

Bonded Summoner

Dragon Samurai

Havoc Mage

Skullclan Hunter

Tactical Soldier

War Hulk

Warchief

Ardent Dilettante

Astral Dancer

Chaotician

Cipher Adept

Defiant

Doomguard

Elemental Warrior

Fatemaker

Visionary Seeker

Chameleon

Loredelver

Menacing Brute

Outcast Champion

Scar Enforcer

Shadow Sentinel

Urban Soul

Battlesmith

Blade Bravo

Cragtop Archer

Dawncaller

Deepwarden

Divine Prankster

Earth Dreamer

Goliath Liberator

Iron Mind

Peregrine Runner

Runesmith

Shadowcraft Mage

Stoneblessed

Stonedeath Assassin

Stonespeaker Guardian

Disciple of the Eye

Dracolexi

Dragon Devotee

Dragonheart Mage

Singer of Concordance

Arcane Hierophant

Champion of Corellon Larethian

Luckstealer

Ruathar

Skypledged

Stormtalon

Whisperknife

Wildrunner

Ashworm Dragoon

Lord of Tides

Sand Shaper

Scion of Tem-Et-Nu

Scorpion Heritor

Walker in the Waste

Dark Scholar

Serene Guard

Solar Channeler

Twisted Lord

Knight of the Pearl

Legendary Captain

Leviathan Hunter

Scarlet Corsair

Sea Witch

Stormcaster

Wavekeeper

Bloodclaw Master

Bloodstorm Blade

Deepstone Sentinel

Eternal Blade

Jade Phoenix Mage

Master of Nine

Ruby Knight Vindicator

Shadow Sun Ninja

Acolyte of the Ego

Anima Mage

Bereft

Brimstone Speaker

Child of Night

Disciple of the Word

Fiendbinder

Knight of the Sacred Seal

Master of Shadow

Noctumancer

Scion of Dantalion

Shadowblade

Shadowsmith

Tenebrous Apostate

Witch Slayer

Dragon Rider

Inquisitor

Knight of the Crown

Knight of the Lily

Knight of the Rose

Knight of the Skull

Knight of the Sword

Knight of the Thorn

Legendary Tactician

Righteous Zealot

Steel Legionnaire

Wizard of High Sorcery

Black Dog

Blade of Orien

Cyre Scout

Deneith Warden

Durrak'ash

Medani Prophet

Nosomatic Chirurgeon

Shadow Hunter

Silver Key

Storm Sentry

Unbound Scroll

Vadilis Beastkeeper

Dragonmark Heir

Eldeen Ranger

Exorcist of the Silver Flame

Extreme Explorer

Heir of Siberys

Master Inquisitive

Warforged Juggernaut

Weretouched Master

Cataclysm Mage

Thunder Guide

Windwright Captain

Argent Fist

Escalation Mage

Planar Shepherd

Sovereign Speaker

Thief of Life

Bone Knight

Cyran Avenger

Dark Lantern

Knight Phantom

Silver Pyromancer

Alchemist Savant

Deadgrim

Dragon Prophet

Elemental Scion of Zilargo

Impure Prince

Quori Mindhunter

Renegade Mastermaker

Vigilant Sentinel of Aerenal

Gatekeeper Mystagogue

High Elemental Binder

Revenant Blade

Atavist

Cabinet Trickster

Moonspeaker

Quori Nightmare

Reachrunner

Recaster

Reforged

Spellcarved Soldier

Landforged Walker

Primal Scholar

Scorpion Wraith

Haztaratain

Black Blood Cultist

Justice of Weald and Woe

Night Mask Deathbringer

Shade Hunter

Thayan Gladiator

Vengeance Knight

Knight of the Flying Hunt

Knight of the Weave

Moonsea Sentinel

Triadic Knight

Gray Hand Enforcer

Knight of the Blue Moon

Moonstar Agent

Sun Soul Monk

Arachne

Auspician

Doomguide

Dreadmaster

Dweomerkeeper

Elemental Archon

Forest Master

Goldeye

Heartwarder

Horned Harbinger

Nightcloak

Ocular Adept

Silverstar

Stormlord

Strifeleader

Sword Dancer

Techsmith

Waveservant

Wearer of Purple

Windwalker

Arcane Devotee

Archmage

Divine Champion

Divine Disciple

Divine Seeker

Guild Thief

Harper Scout

Hathran

Hierophant

Purple Dragon Knight

Red Wizard

Runecaster

Shadow Adept

Darkmask

Entropist

Spur Lord

Thayan Knight

Zhentarim Skymage

Cultist of the Shattered Peak

Glorious Servitor

Magelord

Olin Gisir

Sunmaster

Gnome Artificer

Guild Wizard of Waterdeep

Harper Mage

Harper Priest

Incantatrix

Mage-Killer

Master Alchemist

Mystic Wanderer

Spelldancer

Spellfire Channeler

War Wizard of Cormyr

Arcane Devotee

Black Blood Hunter (Vile)

Celebrant of Sharess (Exalted)

Cognition Thief (Psionic)

Divine Champion

Divine Disciple

Divine Seeker

Evereskan Tomb Guardian

Eye of Horus-Re

Hammer of Moradin

Harper Agent

Harper Paragon (Exalted)

Hathran

Incantatrix

Justiciar of Tyr

Maiden of Pain (Vile)

Martyred Champion of Ilmater (Exalted)

Monk of the Long Death

Morninglord of Lathander

Netherese Arcanist (Epic)

Purple Dragon Knight

Runecaster

Shaaryan Hunter

Shadow Adept

Shadow Thief of Amn

Slime Lord (Vile)

Spellfire Hierophant (Epic)

Spellguard of Silverymoon

Yathrinshee (Vile)

Zhentarim Spy

Court Herald

Merchant Prince

Battlerager

Bladesinger

Breachgnome

Elven High Mage

Great Rift Skyguard

Orc Warlord

Spellsinger

Warrior Skald

Warsling Sniper

Ancient Master

Coiled Cabalist

Fang of Sseth

Master of Vipers

Naga Overlord

Serpent Slayer

Crinti Shadow Marauder

Great Rift Deep Defender

Halruaan Elder

Halruaan Magehound

Hand of the Adama

Jordain Vizier

Luiren Marchwarden

Maquar Crusader

Scourge Maiden

Giant-Killer

Hordebreaker

Knight-Errant of Silverymoon

Orc Scout

Peerless Archer

Wild Scout

Aglarondan Griffonrider

Black Flame Zealot

Durthan

Master of the Yuirwood

Nar Demonbinder

Nentyar Hunter

Raumathari Battlemage

Runescarred Berserker

Shou Disciple

Talontar Blightlord

Telflammar Shadowlord

Thayan Slaver

Arachnomancer

Cavelord

Deep Diviner

Drow Judicator

Illithid Body Tamer

Imaskari Vengeance Taker

Inquisitor of the Drowning Goddess

Prime Underdark Guide

Sea Mother Whip

Shadowcrafter

Vermin Keeper

Yathchol Webrider

Akodo Champion

Battle Maiden

Bayushi Deceiver

Bear Warrior

Blade Dancer

Daidoji Bodyguard

Eunuch Warlock

Hida Defender

Henshin Mystic

Iaijutsu Master

Kishi Charger

Maho-Bujin

Maho-Tsukai

Mantis Mercenary

Mirumoto Niten Master

Moto Avenger

Ninja Spy

Shadow Scout

Shapeshifter

Shiba Protector

Shintao Monk

Singh Rager

Tattooed Monk

Void Disciple

Weapon Master

Witch Hunter

Yakuza

274 The Mystic

275 The Duelist

280 Divine Champion / Eldritch Master

281 Zerth Cenobite / Arcanopath Monk / Truth Seeker / Psi-hunter

282 Blessed of Gruumsh

283 Shining Blade of Heironeous / Radiant Servant of Pelor / Fleet Runner of Ehlonna / Mighty Contender of Kord / Flame Steward

284 Dragonkith

285 Lightbearer / Silverstar

286 Elder Druid / Nightcloak

287 The Athar / The Cipher / The Sensate / The Sinker / The Taker / The Xaositect / Fiend Slayer / Dreadmaster

288 Lifedrinker

289 Poison Fist / Ghost-faced Killer / Weightless Foot

290 Justicar / Dancer of Sharess

291 Gnome Giant Killer

292 Cave Stalker / Fiend Binder / Prairie Runner / The Darkwood Stalker

293 Nightsong Enforcer / The Glaive of Azharadian

294 Windsinger / Nightsong Infiltrator / The Green Hunter

295 Primal Rager / Fierce Grappler / Brawler / Master Siege Engineer

296 Dragonscribe / Knight of the Scale / Heartseeker / Vengeance Sworn / Dragon Mystic / Sphere Minion / Illithidkin / Snake Servant / Waker of the Beast / Acolyte of the Fist

297 Shadar Sentinel / Soulreaver / Arcane Lord / Bow Master / Perfected One / Stalwart Warden / Unholy Ravager / World Guardian / Master of the Secret Sound / Knight of the Chase

298 Deep Avenger / Gloomblade / Gray Sage / Bloodsister / Nightshade / Kabuki Warrior / Dragon Warrior

299 Reaper's Child / Monk of the Enabled Hand / Dwarven Thane / Orc Blademaster

300 Faceless Ones / Deep Thrall / Shoal Servant / Tiger Mask / The Flesheater

302 The Tainted

307 Battlepriest of Cormyr / Council Mage of Cormyr / Noble Adventurer / Moon Drover of Cormyr / Royal Scout of Cormyr / Whitehorn / Follower of the Skyserpent / Tree-Friend / Artist's Vengeance / Ranger of the Night's Watch

308 Aeromancer / Ordinator / Empowered

310 Branch Dancer / Mole / Jobber / Magic Filcher / Stoneface

311 Battle Howler of Gruumsh / Green Whisperer / Memory Smith / The Mourner / Worldspeaker

312 Oppressor / Poisoner / Replacement Killer

313 Mind Mage

314 Heartfire Fanner / Master of the North Wind / Master of the South Wind / Master of the East Wind / Master of the West Wind / Darkwater Knight / Earthshaker / Firestorm Berserker / Icesinger / Purebreath Devotee

315 Silverhair Knight / Companion of the Dead / Shark Cultist / Harmonium Peacekeeper / Anarchromancer / Omatu Master / Eagle Knight / Jaguar Knight / Boge of Nomog-Geaya

316 Master Inquisitive

317 Osteomancer / Flux Adept / Cerebrex / Ranger Knight of Furyondy / Battleguard of Tempus

318 Scout Warlord / Battlemage Warlord / Driven Leader Warlord

319 Aerial Avenger / Shen

321 The Infused / Barber / Corsair / Holy Slayer / Mamluk

322 Shadow Apostle / Deathstalker of Bhaal

323 Spirit Speaker

324 Sworn Slayer

325 Bowman Charger

326 Shaper of Form

328 Chimeric Champion of Garl Glittergold / Itinerant Warder of Yondalla / Justice Hammer of Moradin / Mystic Keeper of Corellon Larethian / Force Missile Mage

329 Thrall of Pazuzu

330 Jester

333 Thrall of Fraz-Urb'luu

335 Charlatan

337 Thrall of Zuggtomy

338 Wormhunter

339 Incantifier / Son of Mercy

340 Master Astrologer

341 Thrall of Baphomet

345 Thrall of Kostchtchie

349 Thrall of Dagon

354 Totemic Demonslayer

357 Spell Sovereign


	2. Chapter 2 THE WALKTHROUGH!

DTN S1E2

The Walkthrough

So I'm going to be walking you through

the worlds largest dungeon

milenia ago

the celestials built a great dungeon

within it

the celestials errected

mamoth walls

locks doors

and traps

it warded off those

who would enter but

but also walled in

those who would escape

it was a dungeon

larger than any ever known

within it

Celestials prisoned

hellish undead

demonic beast

and fiendish

monstrousities

it was a perfect construction

before the first dwarf

would ever be born to sculpt stone

Celestials carved a work of art

that no one

would ever see

perfect in every detail

that would stand

in violent

for thousands of years

but none can say

why the gods would

entomb fiends and liches

and not be destroyed

and in time

the gods would true their

mirror...

murmur?

mr... MERRY

yes...

the gods would true their merry

therefore

it is our contention

dire rats

goblins

and dire boars

make for an excellent

food chain

this is what it is like

when you have a

store bought campaign

instead of making one yourself

sure does

make me think about a lot of things

DUNGEONS & DRAGONS

uhh...

makes me think about

uhh...

voices

and their effect

and it makes me think

about writings

and text

and maps

and lines

and illustrations

and you know

how how long

do you keep

a uhh...

steady state trance

state

imagining

uhh...

FANTASY REALMS

So...

You don't know

how...

but you've been

teleported

to uhh...

bunch of

snowy mountain tops

umm...

right above you is the sun

and uhh...

it doesn't look like

where you are

uhh...

there is a day and night cycle

like where you are

uhm

there is a day and night cycle

there is no day and night cycle

uh...

the sun is directly *about* above you

the uh... clouds

move around it

sideways

circling

the uh... Sun

like a vortex

or a whirl

and uh...

when you look around the

horizon

you see

it's mountain tops

in all directions

a bunch of snowy

mountain tops

and your on the

highest mountain right now

you're climbing the mountain

as you climb the mountain

rocks and debris

debree

slow your accent

numerous tracks

of uh...

different creatures

ascend the hillside

you slay all those creatures

you uh... encounter

either by

sword

or some other

melee weapon

or a range weapon

like a bow

or a crossbow

or use magic

to slay them

you see a man

uh... dead

the size of

a Galleon

Uhm... A

big medieval warship

I don't know if

they still use that

term

Galleon

I don't know if I'm

saying that right

but I've seen that word

used a lot in RTS games

the man is huge like I

said

size of a Galleon

he's already dead

and he's blocking

or no he's not blocking

he's just next to

uh...

the entrance

to A

A uhm...

Into the mountainside

A giant gate

Giant gate

or no!

No, actually no

it's just A

uh...

a pertruding

into

the magic cave entrance

is what I meant to say

and I am doing the worst job

playing dungeons and dragons

at you

into the camera

so... you search

the uh... giant

dead man

he doesn't really have

anything on him

but his pockets

are uh... filled

with uh... bunch of

notes

of weird

arcane

maybe not arcane

runic symbols

hard to describe lines

uhm... you know

thousands of pages

in his pockets

like an entire libray

a libraries worth

of scribblings

all in his pockets

and uh...

you can't make any sense of

any of it

he's uh...

the giant...

uh... man

is already dead

and only had on him

was a bunch of scribblings

in his pockets

in other words

nothing of value

this actually more fun

then I thought it was

going to be

I thought we were going

to have a bad time

but as it turns out

we seem to be enjoying

ourselves

you enter into the tunnel

not afraid of anything

you might find

uh...

you're level one (1) now

but uh... after

uh...

seeing

that giant dead body

all of the adrenaline

pumps through you

you level up

you go to level 2

of your standard

Character Class

that you chose

whether you are

male or female

human

uh... elf

uh... dwarf

Halfling

uh... Gnome

or Half-Orc

Half-Elf

that about covers it

uh... though I would

have let you

choose anything

from the monster manuels

so you could have just been

a monster going through all this

Slaying everything


	3. Chapter 3 INTO THE DUNGEON WE AGO!

DTN S1E3 Into the Dungeon We Ago! So there is a single cave entrance So, you will be entering the cave uh... you go into the tunnels into the mine deep down into the earth going deep into the earth you've been going through caves for a while a long time now the cave is low obviously dug and shallow obviously dug by small crude hands many footprints mark the dirt and debris litters every corner in the back of the caves narrow tunnel pourly lit leads deeper you explore the tunnel more and it leads deeper the tunnel wines into the mountain it's ceiling some six feet high and five feet wide at the widest after about a hundred more feet or so... the tunnel opens into a larger room cut from stone and built rather than dug it is obviously it is obvious something lives here you're at a metallic gate and... you open the gate and enter into a large room with a swirling magma lava flow in the middle or at least that's what it looks like there's fire and- in here screaching noises coming out of it lava flow in the center of the room a flow of molten rock neanders to the south east consuming all it touches bubbling up from the flame flaming river are occasionally pockets of scolding steam shrieking and moaning disrupting the earth's quiet though the flow is indeed hot the floating bits of rock flare into flame you see imp-like creatures playing in the steam tossing balls of flaming slag at the dancing clouds on the firey rivers surface you walk by the magma flow you might have noticed that wasn't an ordinary magma flow that was actually a tear into the elemental plane of fire you advance two levels and are now level four (4) Things are getting more serious now You move into the next room A thick layer of dust covers the floor as two toppled pedistals and a shattered fragment of a marble statue of an elf lie on the center of the room as you watch the marble head shifts slightly it's eyelids flutter open it stares at you startling blue eyes for a moment and eyelids close again this room contains the remains of the victim of a ancient trap the trap is no longer active and the only thing the elf can do is shift her face slightly in the next room an inch thick layer of muck covers the room and closed doors cover the exterior walls deeply charred runes in an unknown language mar the center of each granite door in geometric mosaics of green red and yellow tiles fill the area between each door the ceiling is covered in bronze disc each 6 inches wide the majority of the doors are false doors the runes and mosaics once traps streams of acid from the ceiling and fired LIGHTNING BOLTS from the runes these traps failed centuries ago in the next room the walls and ceilings of the room are featureless hundreds of metallic Links lie scattered on the ground enormous anchors segmented plates jut the floor the prisoner held within this room died centuries ago all that is left are the chains which held him trapped erroded by his evil Scores of motionless ... in the next room Scores of motionless gears Cogs chains and metalic links fill this chamber leaving barely enough room for a human ...uh... squeeze through it silver inscribed etchings each mechanism crackle of feeble electrical charge the room conveys a sense of frustrated power intracate design the room once maintained several fields but the mechanism failed centuries ago and an energy dispersed all that is left is some resonant magical aura that makes creatures nervous and edgy in the next room thick cobwebs obscure vision beyond a few inches a harsh buzz echoes from the interior of the room Tiny spiders scatter before your light and disappear into the webs depth the stentch of rotting meat through the close air of the chamber the only thing in the room is a rotting corpse of a demon killed centuries ago it's body constantly regenerates damage at the same rate it decays maintaining a perverse stasus this body is home to thousands of flies beatles and vermin You may kill all the flies and vermin For XP (experience) Long stare You go up a level You are now level five (5) in the next room the stench of death pervades this chamber the air is thick and a fine cover of dust covers the stone floor a painting depicting a large woman in elaborate pink robes hangs in the center of the north wall under the large wooden coffin it's lid has been smashed open and it's wood has rotted a closer look reveals skeletal remains of a humanoid inside barried with it it's clothes and Sword


	4. Chapter 4 THE UNDEAD ATTACK!

DTN S1E4

The Human comes alive

uh...

or the skeleton

animates

and attacks you

you defend yourself

against the undead

and uh...

slay

or

destroy

the undead creature

gaining some XP

(experience)

you may put the

painting

and the sword and shield

the undead was using

into your inventory

the remains are of

an Orc male

that died centuries ago

while it's not obvious

what he died from

he was burried with

his belongings

you just think

he was a man

of importance

there's more treasure

in this room

an unknown woman

though not of particularly

high

quality

it is

ancient

thus worth over

one hundred (100)

gold pieces

the clothing is rotted

and useless

and the sword is

of masterwork

quality

and requires a

good cleaning

and sharpening

it is possible

the Orc was

burned

with a few other

items

including one (1)

minor

magic

item

not a potion

in the next

room

this room is devoid

of decaration

but it's doors are framed by heavy stone structures

sculpted with runes

and

intriguing patterns

these intricate frames

are beautifully crafted

but otherwise

ordinary

the runes are decorative

and not of any known

language

an Angel sculptor

fashioned the

beautiful doorframe

of this room

which housed archon

builders

when the vast dungeon

complex

was created

a large stone

desk dominates

the otherwise empty

room

an elaborate candlebroom

of tarnished silver

sits on the great desk

and three candles

illuminate vast reliefs

on the walls

representing

the faces of

demons gargoyles

and other terrifying

creatures

the carvings are so

well done

that in the halflight

they seem real

the base reliefs

are fashioned by

celestial builders

of the dungeon

adding art to a

otherwise dismal

surroundings

they represent

some of the most fearsome

creatures

originally imprisoned

with the vast complex

as seen by an angelic

artist

This place is safe to rest

for

about four (4) hours

if you if you

rest

for more than four (4)

hours

You'll probably be attacked

You probably rest for more than

four (4) hours

Cause you are looking

for a fight

You have a random

encounter

Something from the Monster

Manuel

And you you Win

You get XP

(experience)

But you still don't

have enough

XP

(experience)

to level up yet

even though

you are already

level four (4)

from walking

You've also been

gathering enough

loot so far

You have about

as much loot or treasure

as a thrid (3rd)

level wizard

normally would

have

In the next room

the blackened remains

of a great tapestry

hang on a doorway

of this chamber

Beyond the ruined

Tapestry

is a dias

bearing the massive

Throne

Both dias and Throne

are made from the dark

graystone

The same material

As the walls of this

forboding place

The walls are darkened by

Sute

and the faint smell of

burnt wood

Lingers in the air

this room once served

as a meading hall

for the Angel Wardens

Under the Leadership

of their Commanders

The Angels' discouraged

Ways of improving the

security

Of the Dungeon

Demons destroyed this place

Centuries ago

In the next

Empty room

Through the walls of this

Shockingly clean room

Not exactly mirrored

They glimmer with

new reflections

Steams as spotless

as the walls

Doesn't seem to have

accumulated any dust at all

There is a very large

round invisble table

In the Center of the

room

Bolted to the floor

Infact a physical

inspection of the

walls

The floor proves that the

room is not as clean and

spotless

as it appeared

After spending an hour

in the room

you become invisible

As you walk out of the

room

you become visible

again

In the next empty room

the pale brown walls

ceiling and floor

are covered with

some sort of

leathery canvas

Though no means of attachment

Can be seen

the air is stagnant

the odor of sweat is

heavy

in this room

a small dark

irregular circle

seems to be painted on the

floor

at one (1) time

the room was trapped

with an incredibly complex

and powerful

spell

A last line of defense

against a particularly

nasty

inhabitant

of this region

the only remnant of

the trap

is the room itself

made up of the body of the

creature that triggered

the TRAP

the dark paint

on the floor

is actually a

bloodstain

where the floor

was once cut

it's only fifteen (15)

degrees in the room

if you are not dressed

properly

You might be shivering

Unless you are

a monk

and have great

control over your

body

if you are a

monk

or just have a

great fortitude

or will save

you have no

...uh...

the temperature

does not effect you

at all

in the next

empty room

opposite the

massive stone door

of this wall

is a ten (10)

foot tall

statue of

black stone

the effigy

represents a

humanoid male

thick arms crossed

across it's

massive chest

though out of place

the statue is

surprisingly clean

and in good condition

it's pupleless eyes

stare eerily at you


	5. Chapter 5 THE CHRISTMAS EPISODE!

DTN S1E5

As you enter the room

Statues of Angels

I did not mention

Come alive

and

Attack you

You defend yourself

against the statues

Though they seem more

difficult

to slay

with swords

but if you have

specific magic

or bludgeoning

weapons

You might shatter them

more easily

after a while

you probably

succeed at

at destroying the

things

attacking you

the inanimate

magically ...uh... animate

statues

of Angels

That attacked you

You destroy them

and you finally go up

to level five (5)

in the next empty room

a small grove

of trees

surrounds

the stone floor

of this room

standing amist

snow covered benches

and a stone ball

full of ice

the normal floor

piles of the dungeon

give way

to a beautiful

Wintery Landscape

as you look up

to see the top of a

Giant Fer Tree

in the corner

a stone ceiling

blocks your view

the scenic winter wonderland

is real

created by an artist

of unsurpassed talent

with several sets of

marvelous pigments

the trees though not alive

are REAL

the snow and Ice are REAL

anyone can walk among the trees

and kick up some snow

there are no magical illusions

in this room

but the walls are painted in

such a way

to trick the viewers eye

you believe the room

extends for miles

when actually

it ends approximately

ten (10) feet

past the corner

of the walls

you are safe right here

the optical illusion is

PERFECT

you find creatures here

they are resting

this is a safe place

and no combat happens here

you should be getting

comfortable now

So you might want to

grab something to snack on

while I speak at you

you can't stay

at the small grove of

trees surrounding

the uh... stone floor

standing amist the

snow covered benches

... and what not

and uh...

the ice

you can't stay

at this tranquil place

FOREVER

You must depart

Otherwise the story

would end with you

being in that one (1)

room

that whole time

So you leave that

Tranquil room

That you felt like you

could have stayed there

FOREVER

You leave there to

continue adventuring

In this horrible

ma...

Celestial Built

ma...

Millenium old

DUNGEON

This empty room

Has a dense fog

fff...

it fills the room

Obscuring sight

muffling sound(s)

Footsteps can be heard

Walking away from the

door

Through the fog

But beyond that

You find yourself

Completely isolated

From the world

around you

all the sound

in this room

is magically dampened

Past tense (10) feet

This means

more then ten (10) feet

away

from each other

loose contact

completely

until they stumble

Upon each other

again

in the fog

the footsteps

start and stop

every few seconds

and eventually lead

to a door

out of the room

it's almost like

Some unseen servant

helped you

get through the fog

You go into the next empty room

The interior

of this room

Reeks

Of rotting flesh

and flies

Loudly

in the center

of the room

A piled of charred wood

Surrounded by six

humanoid

Corpses

Another corpse lies on it's side

Actually leaning against the

wall

Opposite the door

all the bodies are in

similar states

of decay

Two of them have been stripped

Of everything of value

So there is nothing of value

in this room

the corpses are of six Goblins

lost in the dungeon

Finally settled down here

To rest before taking up their

wandering again

Unfortunately

the goblins

the fellow

watch

fell asleep

and the whole group was killed

by other inhabitants

of the dungeon

We're having a really good time

With Each other

With the whole group

There is probably at least

a dozen of us

Have you ever hung out with this

many friends before

And we all have such great

speaking roles

and we all entertain each

other

and ourselves


	6. Chapter 6 THE FIRE ILLUSIONS!

DTNS1E6

The Fire Illusions

DTN S1E6

In the next empty room

the door to this room is locked

you can pick the lock

or break down the door

break down the door

you break down the door

at the center of this room

is the

badly decomposed

winged body

lays

its arms legs and

wings

cast out to the

four (4) winds

the body has obviously

been the target

of violence

since it's death

the shreds of fine

raiment

cover the body

weapons, armor

goods

been removed

mixed to the body

been been scratched

into stone

some sort of winged being

was tortured here

to the point

where it had to

get it's last words

carved into stone

with it's fingernails

this was one (1)

of the members

of the Celestial

Garrison

Who was slaine

after the first earthquake

before he died he carved

his last words into the

stone floor

in celestial

if you speak celestial

I know one (1) of you

does

In celestial

they read

Abizar Brighthost

I stood fast against

the darkness

and now travel

into the light

let you who find my body

carry on the fight

in my stead

Alzar was slaine

and his corpse

descreated

by the creatures

of the dungeon

this is getting

spooky

before this room is missing

instead there is a pit

of significant

depth

at the bottom

of which

does nothing

but spikes

corpses

the walls and ceiling

are bare

except

for a few scratch marks

a fowl odor

indicates that the bodies

have been rotting for some

time

Who's ever leading

or in front taking point

as we like to say

springs a trap

first

a pit trap

and is now stuck

in open position

a deep pit with spikes

a buck

some

evil residence

use this for garbage disposal

particularly for the bodies

of their enemies

some how

you

uh...

make the correct save

and get out of the pit

trap

getting some XP

(experience)

for the close call

the air is extremely

stagnant

at the end of this chamber

is a door

with an inscription

the door is abnormally warm

heat eminates from the room

beyond

and you can here the sound of fire

and an odd wooshing noise

after short but irregular

intervals

the entire room

you open the door

the entire room

is scarred black

after a few seconds

entirely golfed in flames

creating a whoosh

noise

as air rushes

in to feed the

fire

the process repeats

frequently

greatly taking

rarely taking

longer than

half a minute between burst

whoosh

and a half minute later

whoosh

this room contains a fireball

trap

the trigger has malfunctioned

and the fireball

goes off at random intervals

every 1d6 rounds

So...

It's not really scientific

it's random

the whooshing

destroying anything placed

inside

the vent of the fireball trap

is set in the ceiling

and the lever to turn it off

is on the far wall

if the PCs wish to cross the room

find a way to disable the trap

without getting cooked

you try to disable the trap

it is incredibly difficult

but you succeed

the door to this room

has long ago been splintered

and only a few scraps of wood

hang from the

hinges

the walls of the room

are dominated

dominated

by a large

wooden book cases

lined with scraps of paper

broken bindings and other

remnants of the impressive

librayey

the bookcases

have not faired much better

the entire room is ready to

collapse

once one (1) of the librayies

used by the celestial

Garrison

the room has been exposed to

damp air

DUNGEON

and

Several species of insects

paper eating insects

from the last few centuries

all the books contents are all

but destroyed

any human contact

destroys the

surviving books in this room

but there are few of those to

be found

most of the books in this room

have long ago rotted away

so there is nothing of value

in this descrated libray

While Loki raids

off the walls of this room

constantly bathed in fire

a ring of red and blue flame

coats the walls

and floors

turning the stone black

the wall of fire is an illusion

you walk through it

it produces no heat

and can not harm you

however if you believe its

real

it does 2d6 plus (+)

eleven (11)

damage

fire damamge

like a real wall of fire wood

you see that the walls are clean

and the wall of fire hasn't touched

anything

So...

You make it

You move through the wall of

fire

spell

Cause it was an illusion

the wall of fire was an

illusion

it wasn't really there


	7. Chapter 7 THE VAMPIRE WARLORD!

DTN S1E8

In the next room

is a vampire tome

your entrance awakens

the vampire

the vampire

attacks you

boss battle

after hours of combat

you eventually get the

upper hand

on the vampire

you slay the vampire

but it regenerates

you have to

find the vampire's

weakness

to kill it

completely

otherwise

it will just keep

coming

back to life

maybe you...

light the vampire

on fire

know a sunlight

spell

or have a silver sword

or something

but somehow

you kill that vampire

you go up a level

your like level six (6)

now

level six (6)

you're almost a

badass

almost

now that you are

level six (6)

it's a good time to

stop

and

think about everything you've

accomplished

in this adventure

before you enter into the

really

deep

deeper

parts

of this

horrible

horrible

dungeon

built by celestials

and archons

and deities

Commercial Break

Maybe this is a good place

to stop

Intermission

you're entering into an

entirely different part

of the dungeon now


End file.
